Nosy Baby Stalkers

There seems to be something innate within us all that compells us to stalk babies. This stalking can be seen at the grocery store, the doctors office,and particularly at the mall. Basically anytime that you appear to be leisurely enjoying your life...a stalker appears. They usually start out smiling, then they began to peer over your shoulder, hoping for a quick glance at whats in the carrier/stroller. Some of the stalkers are very tactful, and just "happen" to appear in the same aisle as you. Others try to block your cart, until you are forced to look them in the eyes.

Of course their first comment is always the usual " Ohhh he's so beautiful." My first month being a new parent I truly believed their comments. Yes! Me and my husband have superior genes, and have managed to produce the cutest baby in existence. But one day while shopping in the mall, I happened to glance at a fellow mother across the staircase. She looked confused as she was suddenly bombarded by a hoard of people stalking her baby. Thats when it happened. Everyone said exactly the same thing "Look at her she is so beautiful." Gosh. I thought. I guess this is the standard greeting that everyone says to parents. Its like they are trained to say the same line to all parents. Where does this come from?

After this day I was determined not to be caught in their web of lies. Why should I let them peer into my stroller, just to satisfy their hunger?

That's when I built the anti-baby stalking device.

"Ohhhh can I see the baby?" I quickly reply. "He's sleeping and the light will wake him up."

This annoys them. It thwarts their plans. They were not prepared for this situation. Who wants to wake up a sleeping baby?